In 2003, I dropped to my knees and prayed for God to give me peace. I hadn’t spoken to Him in over 20 years. Thank goodness He was still listening. I was in an abusive relationship with a man I refer to as Prince Harming and misused alcohol to numb out and dumb down. Most days I wondered why I was still alive and frankly not sure I wanted to be.
I began my sober journey first in outpatient, and then, AA and the twelve steps. It was there I learned about the Pink Cloud. I was overjoyed with the awareness I wasn’t as trapped as I thought.
With that knowledge, I broke free from distracting myself with alcohol, and in a few months of being sober everything that seemed to be chaos and destruction started falling into place. In the first year, I made a decision to save my sobriety and leave AA and the Twelve Steps. It took a lot of courage but I knew if I kept thinking about drinking or not drinking I was going to get drunk again.
This is one of the boldest and best decisions of my life.